Steve McNair, Mark Stanford and John Edwards. Do these names sound familiar? If there is one thing you probably know about them is that all these men had a mistress. Take a look at the three most common questions that people ask about married men and their mistress. 

1 - Why do women find themselves in relationships with married men?

Where do men spend their most time at? Exactly! The work place! That is where most commonly men meet their mistress. It may start out as a simple friendship or they may have an initial attraction for each other. The mistress may have been the one who always had an ear for the


men when things were not going well at home or she was the one to live out his fantasies with him. It may also simply be the excitement of doing something you ought not be doing. Either way, it ends up developing into something more than it should not have in the first place.

2 - What do men and women, who might presently be carrying on a flirtation with a married individual, need to know if they are considering taking it to the next level?

If you are thinking about taking things to the next level or you know someone else that is be aware that this will most likely never lead to a good ending. Your chances of getting hurt are very high. You are entering into a


with a MARRIED men. Just think about that. He is married and most likely will not leave his wife for you.Statistically only 3% of married men marry their affair partners and 3% of those actually work (Bercht, 2005).

3 - Often times, one or both of the individuals involved in the affair are emotionally unstable. What are some specific warning signs or behaviors that people should watch out for in their romantic relationships?

The most common warning sign for you should be when you notice your partner trying to control certain areas of your life. This can be done in a passive aggressive manner. Are you making decisions based out of fear or guilt? Think about it. In a healthy relationship, decisions should never be based out of fear or guilt.


Bercht, A. My Husband’s Affair Became the Best Thing That Happened to Me. Trafford Publishing (July 6, 2006).NOTE: You can freely redistribute this resource, electronically or in print, provided you leave the author's contact information below intact. 

About the Author:

Relationship Expert, Janie Lacy, MS offers expert advice to Local and National TV News & Relationship Websites and provides phone or face-to-face counseling in the Orlando area. Janie has a relational approach and a unique ability to connect with individuals. Drawing upon her broad range of experience in private practice, not-for-profit organizations, hospitality and the medical industry, she has helped countless people in many arenas of life. She offers keen insight on all aspects of relationships – family, marriage, parenting, dating, and personal growth. Connect with Janie on